Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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