The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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