My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
