doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
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