both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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