it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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