We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize
