there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Randomize
