Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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