So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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