bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
