I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
