there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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