I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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