Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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