love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Randomize
