I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
