I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
Two words: blizzard sex
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
