i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I'm sobbing to NWA
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Randomize