He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
