Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
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