I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
