I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize