If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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