I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize