She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
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