when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
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