no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
