That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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