Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick