he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize