My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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