Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
