my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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