I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I can't put those talents on a resume
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Randomize
