all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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