I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
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