Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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