That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
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