Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize