I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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