Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(503): View more from Oregon

Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.

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(217): View more from Illinois

Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.

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(913): View more from Kansas

i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(504): View more from Louisiana

He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.

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(302): View more from Delaware

this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"

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(303): View more from Colorado

I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.

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(775): View more from Nevada

Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back

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(248): View more from Michigan

My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween

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