There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.