sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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