We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
