Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
