Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
You are the jesus of drinking
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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