Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
