She is in my trunk
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
