Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
